Old Wounds & New Beginnings
The passing of my father Abel Mathole in 2019 brought to a close a painful chapter in my life. Although my father and mother Gasta Mathole separated over 30 years ago, the pain I experienced as a young girl remains. I am my father’s daughter. How could he abandon me, my mother and my little brother Oupa?
I remember asking him before he left if he could afford two families. He promised. Our descent into poverty was swift.
That we had reconciled before his death is perhaps too strong a word. As much as I no longer wanted to be part of my father’s life, we had reached an uneasy truce.
I am an African woman. Respect for tradition, parents and elders runs deep. Tradition that my father taught me from a young age. Even though my father no longer lived with us, he remained part of our traditional life, the head of our African family until the end.
I accepted early on that my father and mother would no longer be together. What I could not accept was my father’s failure to provide for the family he left behind. No explanation. No apology. And he promised.
I am the eldest living child of Abel Mathole. While my older brothers Mandla and Tshono have long since passed, I also have another younger brother Nthloetse from my father’s second marriage.
As the eldest child I accepted responsibility for winding up my father’s estate. My father was a successful taxi owner, a business he operated out of Ficksburg ferrying passengers between the Lesotho / South African border, Johannesburg and points west to Rustenburg.
Inheriting and sharing ownership of my father’s business was not on my agenda. To say I was conflicted is an understatement. I also needed closure.
My father’s legacy is more than the business he left behind. My father instilled in me a love of our culture, a respect for the old ways and what it means to be African. Did he waiver? Yes, but don’t we all?
I found myself at a crossroads. Continue living with the ambiguity that characterised my relationship with my father, or find closure, a new beginning that celebrates the best of his life and grows his legacy.
The birth of the Mathole Business Family is complicated to say the least. We are far from perfect and continue to make all the mistakes in the book. It is these complications that motivated me to research and understand the dynamic of families and the businesses they own.
My family is not alone. My initiative in the family business space, focusing on Black family businesses located in our townships and rural areas, is both personal as I attempt to understand the challenges faced by my own family, but also part of a larger national project to empower Black business families at the bottom of the pyramid.
I have found a path to grow my father’s legacy.
I have found my peace, I hope you find yours.
